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Eagerly Anticipating a Warmer Planet

Written by The Big Stink on 06 March 2008.

When I woke up this morning my new digital thermometer said it was 6 degrees. It's March 6, for crying out loud, and we haven't had any melting this year to speak of! As I write, it is 10 degrees, going lower.

I want my global warming. I want it now. I don't want to wait. I want to know who's responsible? I'm starting to get angry. I deserve my warming and I need to know which government agency is going to give it to me.

If I wake up tomorrow morning and it's single digits, there will be hell to pay. If one of my DFL legislators reads this, please point me to an agency.

I'm entitled.